Today: Could this be the beginning of the last day?

Kurt came for lunch, brought sushi, and we ate in the cafeteria.  Short because of R's hissy fit.  I had called F earlier because I figured, correctly that he would want to get me to go again... I promised Friday, tomorrow.  I told him (a lie) K need to get his parent badge (which he does eventually).  With Kurt being so 'nice' it makes it hard.  I'm thinking its too soon to tell how F really feels about me (I'm getting signs I am entering fuckdoll status) while thinking he's all I really want.
I want to replay his texts today, they may seem more revealing when I am unswooned. Right now I have a huge crush on him and not just on his body or his skin or the way he moves, but his sense of goofy erratic sense of humor, his mood swings, his sense of himself, his willingness to listen, to learn, his curiosity, his brain... his heritage, his life history, his mostly dead hope, his erratic exuberance over simplicity.

Booo.
Spooky. Where'd you go for lunch?
Chik fila
It was good
How did parent thing go?
He should be good...
Cool
I'm having a hard time with him. My frustration is showing when I think it would be better to have patience
U should have sex and wine!
Remember your theory about dating two guys and by the third one MAYBE I'd be 'ready'?
Wat about it?
I can't wait to prove u wrong. I'm not against ur sex and wine theory. Hence my frustration.
Huh?
I'm lost ...
Haha! Sorry.
Sorry for wat?
Now im really lost lol
Losing you. Can I call u?
(I had tried to call him a few texts before but he didn't answer the phone.  No more in answer to my question...)
Ur frustrated about sex n wine?
Yes!
Hahaha been awhile eh?
U like red or white wine?
White lol.
Crazy monkee sex or boring human kind?
Who cares?!
lol ..
I feel stuck
They have toys for that u know ...
Lol i knew you would say something stupid! ...for unsticking me?
I don't want a toy!
I think I need to stop bothering you!
lol ..
Dont have a panic attack now ..
Wat do you want?
I want a new list of frustrations
It never ends ...
I want to prove your theory wrong too
I realize that
U ar stressed out, ya need to release some ...
How ya gonna do that ?
How u gonna prove my theory wrong?
Its not how its when.
Timing is everything .. But don't forget not everyone is on the same clock u ar ....
I realize that too. I'm discouraged by my own devotion to the virtue of patience.
And kindness! I'm so full of shit! lol!
lol
U ar sexually frustrated thats all ..
That's all?
I can relieve ur frustration not sure about ya stress lol
You're ready to open ur psychotherapy practice
lol
U can be my first client
U can be my first client
U can't be my fixer!
I'm my own fixer. I'm better off at the toy shop!
I think maybe YOU need help.
LoL
I think you need wine
What happened to sex? lol!
Wine will take care of that 'm